“It is photography itself that creates the illusion of
innocence. Its ironies of frozen narrative lend to its subjects an apparent
unawareness that they will change or die. It is the future they are innocent
of. Fifty years on we look at them with the godly knowledge of how they turned out
after all - who they married, the date of their death - with no thought for who
will one day be holding photographs of us.”
― Ian McEwan, Black Dogs
― Ian McEwan, Black Dogs
As we hurry toward
our respective train cars, fearing missed connections and the delays that
accompany them, we make ourselves intentionally, if subconsciously unaware of
our destination; that is to say that we refuse to recognise that our trip must
end.
The important bit
is that we don’t numb ourselves to the entirety of it, this journey of ours.
No, we cannot help
that the train tracks end.
No, we cannot know
when they will.
No, we cannot
change that.
We can
change our urgencies.
Be urgent to enjoy
the scent of the air.
Be urgent to enjoy
the momentary caress of a breeze under a summer sun.
Be urgent to lose
oneself entirely to a lover’s hands or the promise of lovers’ devices.
Do not concern
yourself with maintaining your wholeness – it is through our brokenness that we
feel the world; it is in our shattered states that the world commits us to
memory. It is the cracks in our being that make us who and what we are. It is
in our crooked limbs and minds that our souls take form.
Do not live
vicariously. Live profoundly. Live so that, when this train jumps the tracks,
you aren’t met with the terror of mortality, but the promise of a realistic
immortality.
Adonais
xx
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